20th of July...Maybe.
The length of time between "jaw surgery updates" from me is just ridiculous. There's really no resolving that though because there's truly nothing to report between having my braces tightened, more xrays, and that's about it. Basic thing to say is that everything has been moving along just fine. Slowly but surely.
They are crazy old posts though, so I truly apologise if their layout is a bit naff.
So where am I now?
Ok, so I'm happy to finally be able to say that a surgery date HAS BEEN CONFIRMED! I say confirmed, but the date I was originally given got changed to the one it is now within literally 4 days of it being drawn up for me, so I'm trying not to get my hopes up too much. It seems trying to coordinate all the working parts of a theater team is tricky for admin.
I also have a location too! The Harley Street Clinic, London. The entire procedure, due to the nature of my condition and the extremity of it is being very kindly covered by BUPA (My work place have BUPA as an allocated health insurance partner).
BUPA, if you haven't ever experienced their services or hospitality before are WONDERFUL. Every step of the way, like tracking my diagnosis and test results as we went along, to the eventual analysis of my condition and the surgery required to correct it, has been handled with such sincerity and compassion that I can't even emotionally cope with how easy it was.
So let's talk about what this blog title is all about. It's true, I'm hiding a bit. Actually hiding a lot.
Since the original rundown of issues surrounding my "jaw wonkiness", there have been a few other little issues popping up here and there which ultimately required further investigation, which then in turn had a knock on effect on the proposed surgery dates.
I was actually down to have surgery at the end of April, but then it was brought up how I am a high risk patient for general anesthetic. The gases used in GA are potentially life threatening to me. So much potential that it's not even worth the RISK to try it out, so we needed to take some more tests on me, and be assured by the anesthetist supporting the surgery that I can be "knocked out" by intravenous method only.
THANKFULLY the conclusion was that I COULD be operated on safely using the TIVA method of surgery sleepiness.
So yeah, that panic set us back by about a month. THEN we had something else to contend with.
My jaws suddenly started clicking like mad when I ate or yawned. Also when I yawned, my jaws would "slip" off hinge a little to my right. Nothing painful, just awkward. Perfectly self correctable.
My surgeon was a little concerned that this might be due to the onset of arthritis which in turn would render my whole set of jiggly jaws inoperable! To confirm any impending doom I needed and MRI scan.
THANKFULLY YET AGAIN the results were good. Kinda. There were no traces of arthritis to be seen, however I was there and then diagnosed with TWO "comfortably" dislocated jaws due to the disfigurement of my jaws as they grew anyway, as well as synovitis which is basically an angry set of jaw hinges due to the way they were sitting (i.e. out of place).
ALL more reasons to help my face out and get it put back together properly, right?
And with that, I'm not happy with selfies anymore...
The whole ordeal of my clicky face, awkward speech, wonky yawns, and mouth not meeting in the middle more and more and more as everything shifts is just not helping my personal confidence in social media.
It's funny, I was looking at my old posts on instagram last year, and I would post selfies a LOT (hah). I'd also really love posting style posts here on my blog, you know? Those too have suffered massively.
Thankfully I've been able to share more than just that kind of thing with you over the months gone by, but I know it's been noticed the longer time has toddled along.
Forgive me, but I just don't like my face as it is right now, haha. It's not what I recognise as being comfortably "normal" for me anymore, and part of that might simply be because I can TELL more what's up because it's all been laid out for me in writing!
Mind you, saying that there literally have been bone position changes due to my braces. They haven't only straightened my teeth, but they've also widened the roof of my mouth, and also shifted my bite.
All of this movement into the "wrong position" is actually the "right position" for where my jaws NEED to be in order to have an aesthetically successful surgery result.
SO! I'm hiding behind my Instagram uploads of flowers, food, and Lloyd.
I'm hiding behind progressive house renovation and memories of Japan in my "Japan Diaries".
I'm hiding from events and press releases because I don't want to spit all over you whilst my lips don't close properly when we talk.
But I am here though. You see me in my channels EVERY day. Come say hello, it can't stop me entirely. No chance!
20th of July*...Come get me!